Shobha started our session by saying she did not think she was pretty. She felt she had a tomboyish personality and liked it that way. I have more guy friends then girlfriends. 

When I asked why she didn’t find herself pretty, she admitted she did not know. It was just how she had always seen herself. She remembered how people always praised her sister on her good looks. How the guys in school were always attracted to other girls, but no one showed an interest towards her.

I asked if she could remember when she decided she was ‘tomboyish’ as she had said. That’s when she revealed that when she was in 5^th grade, her uncle had made her sit on his lap and molested her. She had been wearing a dress that day and always wished she had worn jeans instead. Since that day, she felt better in jeans and a t-shirt. She chose to wear loose clothes so that no one would notice her body. Eventually, these were the only clothes she felt comfortable in.

“Do you feel that if you avoid being pretty, you will be safe?

“Yes” she replied.

We explored her feelings about the abuse and worked to find her sense of self.